Scorpio me, Virgo dear, Scorpio son

SO? Who is really the old-fashioned one?

2007-09-27T01:33:00.000+08:00

I am used to hear some young people bragging that they are embracing the latest fashion, music and dance. They chuckle at folks like me in my mid-forties when they think we wear or dress out of fashion. These babies really think they know a lot of the happenings today than us.

SO it must be hip to shout loud about they frequent Saint James Power Station, which they must be thinking we, older generation don’t even know where the hell it is. Big deal? I know the history of that building more than they eat rice. I was a Queenstown resident in those days where power supply came from that former power station.

Young birds keep chirping they are sporting the latest ‘new’ fashion. ‘New’ fashion? Or ‘renewed’ fashion?

Oh, yes. Victoria Beckham and Jolin Tsai wear the Bob hair. SO, every ‘trendy’ lady goes for the Bob. “New fashion, ok!” they said. “New fashion, my foot!” Damn old fashion, all right! My old mother already spotted that style 50 years ago, ok!

I also don’t know why some youngsters laugh when I said I like the music of Michael Jackson and Madonna. Yes, MJ is 49 years of age. “Old cock, old singer” they must be thinking. Madonna must be old dame to them.

SO the dance or music from young-appealing artists Rain, Alan Luo, Lee Hom and those Taiwanese (pretending to be Japanese) boy-bands must be real latest trend? Never mind most of these artists admit they learnt from the dance moves from MJ. If MJ has patented his dance moves in the 1980s, he should be paid huge royalties now. SO ‘new’ dance or ‘renewed’ dance?

These days, SO much talk also on recycling as an alternative solution to global warming? Well, even oldies (songs) are recycled! Just change the slow rhythms or blues to hip-hop and they declared it as the latest hit!

Not forgetting the big, round or oval sunshade spectacles some ‘new’ fashion fanatics are wearing now. They think my mini-lens tinted spectacles are brought from the museum. I have to say again, my old mother is still wearing her those big, round spectacles since from the 60s.

SO? Who is really the old-fashioned one? I dare to ask.

My mum-in-law's 63th traditional home birthday celebration.

2007-07-10T00:09:00.000+08:00

No outside food can beat home cooked food! i simply love the cooking by my parents-in-law. Traditional but yummy! Outside food are often too spicy or oily. Not paying for value.

On Saturday 070707 (7th July 2007), while a group of 777 couples were registering their marriages at solemnisation centres, my wife & her immediate family were celebrating their mother's 63th birthday at home. Coincidentally, there were also 7 food dishes for her big day.

Dish 1: Steam prawns.

Dish 2: Spicy fish.

Dish 3: Fried garlic pak-choy vegetable

Dish 4: Fried mee with sliced eggs & carrots

Dish 5: Fried brownish fish balls

Dish 6: Fried meat rolls

Dish 7 & the most important dish: Birthday Cake!

FINALLY, the birthday song for the grand 63th year-old lady.

Our Collection

2007-06-24T02:27:00.001+08:00

Vietnam's interesting street market & eateries...

2007-04-02T02:00:00.000+08:00

My godson, Venson Ong travelled to Vietnam, Taiwan, Italy and Malaysia last year and gave me thousands of digital pictures to compile for my blog. I simply just don't know how to go writing about his trips.

Perhaps, for a start other than those pictures about hairdressing which can be viewed in www.vensonong.blogspot.com, I made a compliation here about Vietnam's interesting street market & eateries.

Hope it enlighten the difference of life styles in Singapore and Vietnam. Take note that the Vietnamese simple lifestyle comes with broad smiles. Unlike the depressed city of developed Singapore.

So, it's Valentine Day again

2007-02-14T01:35:00.001+08:00

If you ask many people what they think of Valentine Day is all about, you will probably get this general answer. It is a day to remember love.

What does that mean?

A candid friend ever told me what he felt about Valentine in the past. He said a lot of virgins will wake up the next day to realise they become women. Ha ha ha. Well, he did have his point. But that is not my point.

MY point is, Valentine Day today has turned out to be like Christmas. There is a lot of commercial exploitation on it. And retailers are out to make monetary gains. Widespread media advertisements to make you feel awkward if you are single. Yes, there is this "brutal", uncivilised, unnecessary social pressure on how one should pass his time on Valentine Day. I do not know why singles should be embarassed either by themselves for not having a partner or by relatives or friends who are couples celebrating the day.

While many simply regard Valentine Day as a day of love, few actually aware the original Valentine Day is about the executional death of a love-stricken Roman Catholic priest named Valentine. He was charged & sentenced to death for marrying his love. In that era of the Roman regime, marriages were prohibited by law.

Since then, for his guts of love, February 14th, the date of his execution was commemorated as Valentine Day, to mark the significance of love. But that love is about one that matures into marriage even though marriages were forbidden.

Today, we do not need to forbid marriages. Many choose not to get married in the first place. The modern generation believes in love leads to sex or companionship. No need to get married. They can get along, so stay together. They say "marriage is the death of romance & the beginning of divorce." If the love has faded in years, or months, or just weeks, then "you walk on your sunshine road, I go by my wooden bridge" as the Chinese proverb goes

Too bad. I am always the traditional man.

In 1994, Valentine Day, I was one of the 100 "clowns" forming the long queue at R.O.M., Fort Canning Hill.

Today, I am curious how the 100 pairs of couples have been doing. How many still survive that marriage? I said "that" marriage? Because some may have already remarried. Ha ha ha. Or some may have gone back into "single" status again.

Humour aside, I am a real fortunate man. My wife sticks to me like superglue all these years, in my joy & sorrow, my ups & downs of my career. Most important, our efforts to keep our marriage alive

To my wife:

I may no longer that young prince charming anymore. But don't you worry. You are not the sleeping beauty also. You are now my queen. I was the man of few romantic words & sometimes no words at all. This is because I kept my love for you in my heart.

My wife is my Valentine. I don't need another. 13 years of marriage is not enough for me. Let us go on. Make it another 13 years & more. We will do it together.

From your Valentine.

Singapore's weird Friendster generation

2007-02-09T01:24:00.000+08:00

I wonder how many parents in Singapore are awared that their young daughter or son with friendster.com accounts, are actually "married" as claimed in their friendster profiles.

While Singapore Government is lamenting on increasing decline of marriages in Singapore every year, there is a new development of increasing inclination of "marriages" taking place in the popular dotcom known as Friendster.

Pardon me, these are not real marriages. Otherwise Singapore may have to answer to the United Nations for the "cases" of such child marriages in friendster. You see, a lot of these "marriages" are among the young. Some as young as below 16. In scores of friendster public profiles of these youngsters which I read, most of them declared themselves as "married" simply to mean they are "in a relationship" or "attached" with a boy- or girl-friend.

Never mind their connected friends in their friendster account are reading their personal stuff. Calling each other "lau gong" (hubby) or "lau po" (wife) is so hip. Expect public display of loads of intimate pictures in their friendster profiles, showing them kissing their boyfriend or girlfriend. Also a lot of testimonials which become love-letters. This testimonial column is provided by friendster.com for the purpose of giving testimony of tributes by friends to the person in the profile. But some love-struck youngsters use it to declare their love.

Friendster.com has become so popular these days with membership hit 37 million worldwide since its founding by Entrepreneur Jonathan Abrams in 2002. It is certainly an another wonder of the entrepreneurial world just like youtube which connect people altogether. In certain ways I personally feel friendster is a better cheap option in connecting people internationally. The main catch of its popularity lies in the free registration & the ease pf uploading sef-pictures or video.

Its objectives as described by friendster adminstration are to trace back lost contacts, distant friends from all parts of the world, including sharing of pictures or videos. But in Singapore, the perception of using Friendster by our young generation takes a totally different aspect. This weird declaration of "married" status is happening among the young or mentally young. Very different from the western friendster profiles which I read. It shows our young Singaporeans are immature or failed to mature way beyond our western counterparts.

There are young dating couples chatting everyday on the phone or via SMS. Some already even cohabited, staying together. But they still do very weird things, that is, posting their love messages for each other through their friendster. At least they would have full privacy doing so via phone or sms. So, why still post such nauseating love messages in friendster's testimonials? Could it be they want their love messages to be publicised? Could it be they want the whole world of their friends to know their affairs?

For these "married" profiles, some attach intimate photos of themselves with their "spouses" with their lips locked in intimate kissing. And when their relationship hit rocks or break-off, anyone reading their profile will know for sure. How come? You see, those intimate photos with their "spouses" will be deleted together with all the love messages.

Going by their logic of "married" status, I wonder why none of them declared themselves as "divorced" in their profiles once after they broke off. Why just simply deleted away photos of their "ex-spouses" and click back to the status of "single"?

Some young friendsters who state "married" status would have probably broken the high marriage record set by Hollywood golden actress, Elizabeth Taylor. Because they "re-married" a few times within a short period of a year as they broke off several times. Others declared in friendster profile that their lovers as "the one" even though that present lover is actually already "the 5th one" then.

Why do these Singaporeans, particularly the young, want the whole world to see what is "inside their bedroom" or "washroom"?

When you try to behave like celebrity couple, allowing strangers or friends to know so much details of your affair, BE PREPARED. Be prepared to be scrutinised publicly or even criticised by close friends either on you or your partner or on compatibility between both of you. Remarks from such connected friends may be bitter pills, a mockery on your stupidity. Do not simply just dismiss such critical remarks as none of their business. It won't be nobody business for an information put on public screen by your weird self.

The Eye everywhere....

2007-02-02T04:19:00.000+08:00

Flood Gates of Living Hell...in opening year 2007

2007-01-17T01:01:00.000+08:00

Is this the Johor Bahru I know? I am totally speechless, absolute loss of words after viewing all the pictures. So, I choose to leave this post, near empty, no contents.

Closing the year 2006 on unsatifactory note...

2006-12-31T00:14:00.000+08:00

So, today is the last day & final hours to closing the year 2006. Most of us may countdown into the new first day of new year 2007. That alone is simple reason for celebration. Smiles are everywhere. Everyone want to think new year brings something new, particularly if we have endured a bad year 2006 of problems. Problems of our own, or our relatives or friends whom we heard from.

The common thought is - cast every problem in your mind aside first, especially in the last few minutes of countdown to 2007. Whether you celebrate at Marina Bay or at home, you do not want to be left out in this thought.

The wish list for 2007 is long. At least, I got to hear some from some of my friends. And the wish list is the same as last year's. It is all about monetary. I have no longer heard anything of marriages as in the past years but I do hear a lot of divorces in 2006 among my acquaintances. I have seen other young couples who are not my friends, struggling to find money to get married. I have also seen married couples easily, without much struggle to get divorced, also because of money.

This year, we seen quite a number of suicides. Teenagers or youths killed themselves in the name of love. For the years whom their parents have painfully brought them up, they have decided that they love their girl- or boy-friends more than their parents. They kill themselves to prove their love over love problems. Leaving their parents to live painfully & in grief for the rest of their lives. After their suicidal death, the person whom they love eventually go for another love. Does that make the love-stricken person died in vain?

Jumping into the MRT tracks is now a known new way of suicide in concrete city Singapore. The past norm is to jump down from high-rise building. The MRT track-jumpers are notably adults who are unemployed & in deep financial debt.

Will our lives be better in 2007?

Many friends ask me what my new year 2007 resolution is. I told them usually I don't fancy this new year resolution stuff. Once I determine to do something, I just do it. I don't wait for a new year to execute my plan. But just for the fun of it, I told them my new year 2007 resolution is to review & complete my old resolutions of 2006.

When we wake up into the first day of 2007, somehow emotionally, we shall sense a new breath of air as if the new year come along the new person....

The moment when we are fully sobered, perhaps after rubbing our eyes or washing our faces, we realise only the day is new, the year is new but the problems of the old year 2006 still linger on....

The worst fear to everybody is - the new year bring new problems, adding to the old.

The truth is - LIFE STILL MOVES ON....

Life will never change for the better IF we are still the same old person slacken & weigh down by our old problems. Life starts breathing anew only when we take the challenges in the new year with renew determination to tackle the old problems.

This new year 2007 will see some more earthquakes, more disasters, more property prices running into higher fever, more suicides, more terrorism, more political scandals, more road accidents (as I see more new cars on the road) & perhaps the outbreak of North Korea war. So much for the coming new year.

Goodbye 2006. Come 2007. I take you on!

The First Christmas Story Untold....

2006-12-25T02:45:00.000+08:00

Every year when Christmas comes around, we got to hear the all-familiar story of a naked baby boy, Jesus, wrap in a piece of cloth, lying in a manger. Joseph & Mary, the proud couple residing next to the boy while shepherds together three Magi watching closely at the manger, looking with rejoice over the baby. Above the manger, shines the brightest star of the snowy night.

This is the known Christmas version of the birth of Jesus Christ. You don't need a Christian to tell you the biblical story of the birth. Probably they will tell the same story. Or not surprisingly, some church-goers may not even know the details. Most of them know the basics or "must-have" points in the popular version which the world today know.

THE FIRST CHRISTMAS STORY AS POPULARLY TOLD
The baby boy born naked in a manger, near to a fully-packed inn. It was falling white snow outside. The parents, Joseph & Mary, neatly-dressed & peacefully watching their baby. Some shepherds neglected their flock of sheeps & came at the manger to offer blessings. Above the manger, a bright new shining star which led the three Magi or popularly called wise-men, found the baby boy. They bow on their knees & worship the new-born king with expensive gifts. All these popular features of the story as told to be the First Christmas. Loving, peaceful & enchanting story which many love to hear.

One thing was clear - Santa Claus is missing in the First Christmas. He is known to appear centuries later after the birth. Today, he is best remembered than the baby himself on Christmas Day.

WHOSE BIRTHDAY IS IT?
A baby was indeed born in a manger & grew up to be Jesus Christ. But it was NEVER on December 25th or what we know as Christmas Day. In fact, the word "Christmas" is never a biblical term. And the birth date of Jesus is never revealed in the holy scriptures as well. Interesting? If this is such an important date in the history of mankind, can you imagine none of the first disciples of Jesus who wrote the New Testament, bother to record the birth date of the man whom they worship in high esteem.

I'M DREAMING OF A WHITE CHRISTMAS.
It seems that even this popular carol has spoken a truth. White Christmas is only a dream or a myth if for the exact word. The flock of sheeps neglected by the shepherds, must have frozen to death in the snow as their masters make their way to the manger. Animal cruelty? These shepherds must have something wrong in their heads for they bring their flock out in the snow where there is no green pastures. Have you heard of sheeps love ice-cream rather than eating grass?

I could be living in tropical Singapore for too long. I should have known nuts about winter. I must have done very badly in geography when I was in school. The popular story want me to believe you can see a shining star up in the sky during winter when snow is falling. Never mind you can't see the moon which should be so much bigger. Now I start really see stars.

THE SHINING STAR STOP ABOVE WHERE?
I believe in astrology & I read alot about it. Some of my friends who are Christians remarked negatively at my astrological practice. But they were silent when I told them the decorative star which they put on top of their Christmas tree is indeed related to astrology. Yes, the star or birth star of Jesus Christ which most Christians believe as mentioned in the bible.

And it is crystal clear to me that the three Magi mentioned in gospel of Matthew are astrologers. They studied the star which led them to found Jesus, the child but not the baby. Yes, by the time they found Jesus, he could no longer just a baby in the manger. The star is said to represent the birth star of Jesus which appear on the day he was born. The three Magi from the east who were travelling on camels from their own countries, could not have possibly found the baby Jesus in Bethlehem within 24 hrs. It would have taken months!

The Gospels of Matthew & Luke account the birth of Jesus quite differently. While the three Magi were mentioned in chapter 2 by Matthew, these three Magi were significantly NOT stated in the account by Luke. Only the writer, Luke gave more details of the birth, the manger & the shepherds. But all these were absent in Matthew's. Matthew instead focus on the shining star, the three Magi & how King Herod made use of them to track down the boy Jesus.

It is clear that the accounts by Matthew & Luke are set at great different time after the birth.

At Matthew chapter 2:9-12, Matthew wrote the three Magi may have taken more than a year when they found Jesus. The Magi found the child in an enclosed house, not the open manger. Matthew further described the baby Jesus was now a child, no longer a baby. The boy Jesus, should be by then not more than two years of age. This explained the rationale as stated in Matthew 2:16 of why King Herod who long to get rid of the baby, issued the decree of killing all the boys in Bethlehem who were two years old & under.

DOES IT MATTER?

Does truth really matter in this modern age? There are full of lies & untruths in tabloids. The truth is - people love reading them & even believe them. Once a friend who is a Christian told me many Chinese traditional practices are founded on mistakes & we Chinese just carry on the mistake to this day. He was stating about the origin of a Lunar New Year couplet "福" (fu) as to why the "fu" word was written inverted or hang upside down in most Chinese homes. Though I know that story since when I was very young but I pretend to act ignorant for the benefit of my "knowledgeable" friend.

Back in the days of China during the time of powerful empress dowager Xi, who was notoriously feared by the emperor & her people. Her subjects got executed easily for the slightest mistakes they make & infuriate her. It was said that she asked an eunuch to write a couplet bearing the word "福". But an illiterate attendant to the eunuch hang the couplet upside down by mistake. When the empress dowager saw it, she was furious & ordered the attendant to be executed. But the wise & quick-thinking eunuch explained to the dowager that the couplet was deliberately hung inverted or "到", to signify "福" or prosperity have "到" arrived at the premises. The attendant was spared as the dowager was very pleased with the explanation. She ordered all such couplets to be hang upside down from then on.

My friend was actually trying to convince me that a lot of Chinese religious or cultural traditions were derived from mistakes or unfounded bases. I wish to tell him the same thing. Well, some church practises today are not spared either.

Christmas is a myth, truth or untruth. Let the reader judge for himself. As for me, I am just happy that Christmas season do provide a wonderful opportunity for me to have some good time with my wife & son.

No matter what. Merry Christmas to you & your family.

Why, Ah Gong? Why?

2006-11-26T00:00:00.000+08:00

The next time when out of the blue,

you simply miss someone dear to you.

Don't hesitate to pay him or her a visit.

Believe me. If out of the blue, for no reason, you suddenly miss an aged relative, don’t hesitate to pay him or her a visit as soon as possible. This is because sometimes the unexpected can happen. Yes, you may end up like me, won’t be able to get to see the person forever anymore.

I do not simply mean only aged people can die anytime. Death will eventually come to any one of us, the young or you or me. It is only the question of when we least expect it to be. What really can jolt us is to hear sudden unexpected death of close friends or relatives who are known to us as living happily, at least on the surface.

In the past, I have seen enough of deaths to be able to take the news of another.

In 1976, I lost my father to pulmonary cancer.
In 1991, I lost my aunt (my father’s only sibling) to leukemia.
In 1992, I lost my paternal grandmother to illness as a result of stroke.
In 1997, I lost my young sidekick, Thomas, to a road accident.

Thomas’ death was in fact, totally unexpected as compared to my late relatives. He was then only 22 years of age. His motorbike collided head-on with a public bus. Can we say he died on the line of national duty? Because he was rushing back to his army camp after sending his girlfriend home first, in order to meet that well-known last minute book-in time of 2359. He never make it.

On Thursday, 26th October 2006, an unexpected sudden death of someone close to me shocked me. He is an aged 81 year-old friend, so close and loving to me that I called him Ah Gong (grandfather).

What? I am talking about an old man? An old man whom will “go” anytime and I deem it as unexpected?

Ah Gong is actually my best friend’s grandfather. My best friend is called KG. I know KG for almost 12 years. We are very close that he calls me brother, as I am a few years older than him. KG was bought up by Ah Gong personally and stayed at Ah Gong’s house from infancy till he left overseas for University. It was from knowing KG; I come to know Ah Gong.

It was a very pleasant first meeting. The old man, known for his stubbornness and skepticism of others, actually like me. I called him Ah Gong with deep respect in my heart. He has always been the patriarch in the big family. Every lunar New Year, I would not stop visiting him. Usually, I would send a nicely decorated NOEL hamper to him in advance. And KG, perhaps representing Ah Gong will give me my all-time favourite food - the traditional roosted pork meat (bak kuah) in return.

On 25th September 2006, which happen to be my 12th wedding anniversary, I accompanied my son to get his Hanuman tattoo done. Later we visited the Kuanyin’s temple and stumbled upon KG and his wife. I have not seen him since early this year. We chatted for a while and split as they were in a hurry to the crowded temple.

That very night, for no reason, I miss Ah Gong. I was thinking I did not seen him for quite some time and whether I should wait for few months down the road when Lunar New Year 2007, I shall visit him again.

Again few weeks lapse, I keep thinking whether I should not wait till Lunar New Year. Then at night, Ah Gong was in my dream. I got a scolding by him for why I had not visited him, as he wanted to cook lunch for me.

October 26th, Thursday, I made up my mind to visit Ah Gong by coming weekend. At 8.00pm, I received a call from KG. He shocked me with this piece of news – Ah Gong is dead.

I asked him what happened to Ah Gong. He mumbled Ah Gong died of old age. I did not know KG was hiding something. The next day, I went to Ah Gong’s house. I saw the undertaker and immediate family members already all gathered there. When his embalmed body was bought back to the house from mortuary, my heart sank with my tears flowing down my cheeks.

Did he have a fall? Did he fall sick? Was it due to the haze? They kept quiet and said in due time after the funeral, KG will inform me the cause of Ah Gong’s death.

In the midst of my enquiries, someone in the house told me this shocking truth: Ah Gong hang himself. He used something which is very familiar to him - his fishing line.

Sigh…

Ah Gong was a very active man in his younger days. Even at this old age, he would drive out in his car to visit the wet market. He spends most of his time at home to do cooking various kinds of dishes. Or at times, he will do some gardening. As his old age does not permit him, he has since given up his hobby of fishing.

Unknown to me, Ah Gong was not happy with his old age. He had developed depression due to self-frustration over his fragile body of diabetes as well as insomnia for a period of time.

Ah Gong is gone. The way he passed away upset me deeply. I am still not able to live with this truth. The man whom I respect a lot and I always love to call him Ah Gong, is gone - just like that. So is his depression. So is his insomnia. But he has left me very heart-broken.

Rushing for Reincarnation?

2006-11-11T22:55:00.000+08:00

Something is seriously wrong with us, Singapore. Yes, there is really something wrong with us, young and old all alike. We rush hastily for the least reason in our daily lives. And very often, we rush as if we are dying soon and probably we won't have enough time left.

At the start of each day, the moment we start out from our house, our lives are already in a rush. Stepping out of the house is like stepping straight onto a rat race.

At the bus-stop or MRT station, even if we are the last few to arrive, we want to be the first few persons stepping into the carriage. Before the train stop comfortably in front of the awaiting crowd, we would have probably stand on the yellow box, all ready to go in first before them. When the train's door opens, those commuters waiting to come out will appear to be like ghosts to us. Because we can't see them and we choose to rush in as if we can penetrate through them just in order to grab a vacant seat.

When we reach our destination, we also want to be the first to alight. So we will squeeze our way through the crowd and stand right in front of the door. Never mind that the train is still one or two stops before our destination.

How about on a bus? If the bus start to move before we could abroad or alight safely, we will sure to complain about public bus drivers been very inconsiderate to rush. But when we are already in the bus and the bus driver has to wait for slow elderly persons to abroad or alight safely before moving on, we complain the bus driver is taking his own sweet time.

At the food court, our packet of tissues will become a powerful symbol of power and authority. (Read my earlier post dated September 19th - that tissue of power & authority). We will use it to "chop" or book our seats first by putting that packet of tissues on the table or chair. And we think that we are really smart people, using worthless tissue papers rather than our mobile phone. People will steal mobile phone but not a packet of tissues. So the packet of tissues is likely to be around after we buy our food and we can return to claim our "chop" seats.

In contrast, I read an article on Forum Page in The Straits Times years ago, about a Singaporean couple placed their luggage to "chop" lobby seats in South Korea at Busan airport. They walked away for a while and returned to find their luggage been thrown all over on the floor and the seats taken. They dared not to utter any word but realised Korea do not practise such "kiasu" culture like Singapore. I would say they should be happy that their luggage were still around and not stolen.

At National Library, I went to the counter to pay fines for overdue borrowed books. I was the only customer there then. The librarian was calculating the fine amount. A primary school boy came to the counter. He was supposed to que behind me. Instead, he stood next to me, facing the librarian and using a coin to keep tapping on the desk while waiting for me to finish. The tapping shows his impatience. I looked at him and asked him why the rush when he supposed to que behind me. He ignored me and kept tapping the desk. The librarian also ignored him and only talked to me. Then the boy kept making chirpy noises with his lips to show his impatience. I looked at him and said: "Are you rushing for reincarnation?" His face turned red.

Think that the mad rush behaviour of Singaporeans will stop once they reach their homes? Well, at the lifts of our block, we rush to go in first before others in the lift could come out. The exact same behaviour we see at the MRT station.

Such behaviour forgivable? Such distinctive of Singapore that we should feel proud instead of ashamed? Singapore culture? No, no, no. It is NOT culture. It is sickness. Social sickness. Culture has roots in historial generations but such kiasu behaviour did not exist in the early days of our forefathers. We may have developed over the decades and our standard of living has improved. However, our fear of failures and losing out have cultivated us into the roots of kiasuism.

The Japanese have advanced technologically but developed their roots deeply into their traditional culture of good civics. Their gentleman behaviour is really cultured. Ours is far from culture. And when we are put in hectic situation such as in the crowd of MRT station, we do not show ourselves as cultured. We behave rather like vultures, beating our way through the crowd as if been the first to be, is always the best to be.

Who got the last laugh?

2006-10-22T00:04:00.000+08:00

Last week, I paid a visit to an old friend at his penthouse after he rang me. We had not met for almost two years. He is married with a teenage son and toddler.

We chatted about the current bad economic situation and recalled some good old memories back to the days when we used to plug in our walkmans to Michael Jackson's hits such as Beat It and Billy Jean. He then wanted to show me his new purchase, a set of DVD collection of Michael Jackson's number one hits. However, he can't remember where he has placed it.

Later, he said it must be in his son's room because he heard him played the DVD on the audio hi-fi system in that room few days ago. So, he went into the son's room. An unexpected commotion broke out.

The boy, or rather I would like to call, the little emperor, was listening to loud music with a pair of audio headset on. It simply started with my friend calling loud his name, asking him if he has seen the MJ set. Obviously, the boy can't hear him. The father went to in front of his eyes and signalled him to bring down the headset first. The boy ignored him and kept yelling loud: "What? What?".

"I said take that headset down first!" Wow...that was loud, typically of the ex-army commander I had known for years. This time, the boy heard him but he reacted slowly, showing his reluctance. Next, as predicted, my friend took the obvious step. He pulled out the headset from the boy. And the teenager showed his frown face. The staring challenge erupted.

My friend stared back at him sternly, sending chills down the boy's spine. (By the way, this friend of mine is known for his f*** face. Ha ha ha.) The boy later withdrawn, looked down and dared not to look up.

For a moment, I thought it was going to be doomsday. I knew the man very well who was notorious for quick-temper and iron-fists. I was expecting the young man going to receive some slaps on his face.

Surprisingly, my friend took a step back. With a mild tone, he told the son he simply just wanted to ask him if he had seen his MJ DVD set. "Is there anything wrong with that?" he asked the boy politely but in a firm voice. Hey, hey, hey, who's talking? My friend? Oh yes, fatherhood had changed him!

The son still with his head hanging down, gave a very meek reply "No".

"Then, is it with you?"

The boy turned to his CD rack and ran his fingers through the vertical stack of his CDs. As he did that, I saw his CDs of korean artist Rain, Kangsa & Vanness, american Usher, Westlife, Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears, and of course, Taiwanese artists Jay Chou, S-H-E, Jolin, 5566. (Don't ever buy this 4D, it never strike the top three prizes according to Singapore Pools nor starter prize since year 2000. *hahaha*)

At the bottom of the rack, he pulled out "poor" Michael Jackson, as if, signifying his fall from top to bottom.

He gave to his father. Before leaving the room, my friend turned around and asked to be informed if next time he wanted to take the MJ DVD again.

Guess what the boy replied? He mumbled. "I don't listen to old cock's songs okay." "Not my type." "Now is Usher, Rain or Jay Chou."

What an exploded egoism of this hip-hop generation. The smart aleck should not have spoken.

This time his words had sent two uncles' (not one) temperature rising. Not the latter part of his words we took offence. It is the term "old cock" he used either to indicate us - his father and myself.

Before my friend could say anything, I hurled back a question to the son.

"Hello, young man! What do you mean by old cock? Huh?"

I locked in my eyes straight onto the boy's face. He was frozen. My face might have been worsen than the earlier face of his father stared at him.

"Which old cock you mean? Huh? Your father, or me, or both of us?" I talked even louder than my friend.

The child stood there stunned, as if he received an electrical shock.

Actually to be fair to him, he was trapped by my hyperbolical question. Whichever answer he gave to my three choices, he is a dead man.

My friend looked at me and smiled. I was kind of surprised by this gesture. Later, I detected he was in reality, giving me the approval to chide the boy. So, I did not hesitate to waste time then.

"Do you know what is mutual respect?" I said to the young man. The teenager hung down his head and kept quiet.

"Hey! You got the balls to call us old cocks and you don't have the eye-balls to look at us?"

The boy peeked. "Sorry, uncle. I don't mean to say you." Now he replied and as I said he was trapped by my question. Any reply he made - he will be dead.

"Not me? Then must be your father huh?" I looked at my friend and smiled cunningly. My friend chuckled.

"No, no, no." "I don't mean you all. So sorry. I mean Michael Jackson is old and history, not my type."

"So? So you mean Michael Jackson is old cock lah? Huh?"

"Wake up, young man! Respect your elders. Respect means also respect their tastes and types. You are proud of yourself simply because you think you are young and belong to what hip-hop generation. It does not make you or your generation any smarter than anybody, okay."

"We all also learn from history of generations and our forefathers' experiences. Simply because you listen to Rain, Usher, Justin or what's that?" I randomly grabed a CD from his rack. It happened to be Taufik Batisah. "And Taufik? So you think you are very hip, very fashionable, right?"

The boy chose to keep quiet as if he was struggling for the right word to answer back.

"You said Michael Jackson is history? Then let it be. But do you have to mock fun at us or our generation who grow up with his songs?"

"Have you heard of the proverb - history keeps repeating itself?"

"Huh? You mean Michael Jackson come back? I don't think old man can upbeat Rain or Usher."

"Beat it or beat them? Do I care much of that? I mean your attitude! Attitude of your generation. Self-assuming, proud and bad. You think just because you are hip with what Rain or Usher, Justin, or blah blah....make you one kind or big deal?"

"You know what your Rain, Usher, Justin and even Taufik have in common? Huh?"

"Don't know."

"Don't know? Don't know and want to be their fan? You think they are original talents? I tell you they are followers, all imitators of Michael Jackson. Look at the way they move, dance and even hiccup on the stage. Or dressed up in black or white like Jackson, okay."

"So you know what does that mean? Michael Jackson's old cock?"

"It means Rain, Usher, Justin or Taufik - your idols - they are all fans of old cock lah!"

I finished abruptly and walked out of the room. And I can hear burst of laughter right behind me. (I should have told him if not because of your father's old cock, you won't be in this world. *hahaha*)

There is one comfort I draw from the whole incident. God bless me. That is NOT my son. My son who also hip-hop, have respect for my likes and dislikes. He listens patiently to my songs whenever we frequent karaoke even though I know those songs are not his likes. And he don't look down on older generation.

Are you afraid of loneliness?

2006-10-17T01:42:00.000+08:00

Ever wonder why we are so afraid of loneliness?

Don't boost that you are surely not one of them!

The plain truth is: Many of us, in fact, the majority are afraid of loneliness. The fear of loneliness, so great that even the shyest person find comfort in Internet chat rooms which have become so popular throughout the world. And no doubt at all, many lonely persons want to be connected to the outside world but yet they do not want to trust the world outside. So they think it is always safer to chat with the virtual world?

The human fear of loneliness is very ironical. Consider this fact: We come fully naked and alone into this world. The day will come that we have to leave alone from this world. Yet it is the living in this world which we can't tolerate to be alone!

So the social disease of the fear of loneliness catch on. In simpler term for the younger generation, they do not want to be left out alone from groups. Loneliness has become a peer pressure. By the time you reach teenage, you must have a girl friend like most of your peers. No girl friend? You must be gay. Or you can't walk alone in the streets or shopping malls. You must be seen in company. Or else your peers will think you are damn weird.

Is fear of loneliness again, the reason we see why some modern church worships are packed with young people? Seeing most of these young churchgoers on one hand, holding the bible but on the other hand, holding the hand of a girl or boyfriend? Or afraid of letting your friends know you just went to watch a movie all alone?

What went wrong? What has happened to us? What has happened to our society? This fear of been identified as lonely is now the social disease which has reached incurable stage.

Wait....we urinate alone. We shit alone. We bathe alone. But we can't shop alone? And we can't watch a movie alone? Sleep? Well... it is true for those sexually active, like in Paul Anka's song "I don't like to sleep alone".

What we did not realise may be we bother too much into what other people think of us. Been alone is NOT a sin or a curse. It can be a blessing. We still need our space for privacy.

Ever realise something? It is a fact that in the moment of loneliness or privacy, we find our true self. Because many of us, especially the young when in the company of groups or with their boy- or girlfriends, tend to behave in the way to please them. They become simply NOT themselves. They become someone else for the sake of that someone.

Only in this populated society, we find our courage to live alone, not affected by gossip or peer pressure. We find our thinking pure, not intoxicated by the words of other people or have to be suspicious most of the time of what people said or think of us.

Teenage Kuanyin starts her holy life in loneliness in the mountains before she ascends to the heavens. A woman who shows no fear. No worries of the man-eating beasts in the mountains. Rain or shine, unmoved by the fear of loneliness. Her mediation stays foot. Her chanting thoughts continuous.

If we are to be so fearful of loneliness all the time, how are we going to face the day when we are to die alone? Let nature takes its course. If we are not meant to be lonely, even if we want to be alone, we may not have the chance to do so.

My son - the Muay Thai trainee

2006-10-08T00:50:00.001+08:00

My son loves Muay Thai since when he was a kid.

I remember I first met him when he was 16. I used to see his swollen knuckles on both of his hands. Without a doubt, I knew he must have been punching sandbags or walls. He was the typical teenager at that time, rather quiet & shy type. Who will ever know he actually loves Muay Thai so much?

He finally got his dream - learning Muay Thai formally & with blessings from his mum & me.

Most Chinese parents will frown at the idea of having their son learning Muay Thai - an art considered violent or brutal by majority.

But wait....bear in mind every parent always want the best out of their children. This in an undeniable fact. The bright aspect I see in Muay Thai is - the art itself is noble, versatile & straightforward. The brutality actually serves to bring the best form out of the trainee. And like all other martial arts, it is an excellent form of physical training & self-defence. If Muay Thai has to be labelled as violent, so are all other martial arts.

The Muay Thai art, often mistaken & confused as Kickboxing, is also known as The Art Of Eight Limbs where almost every joint part of the body can be used to execute the powerful strike. The hands, shins, elbows & knees are used extensively in this art. Due to regular strenous Muay Thai training, my son is physically quite muscular with broader shoulders & tougher legs to deliver powerful kicks which can break woods. His abs are appearing more clear-cut, soon on way to be six packs. Together with the spirit of Hanuman, he has become a different person with more physical agility & sharpness in insight.

Spiritually, due to progressive religious learning & chanting of thai prayers, he has matured a lot over the years & become very charitable-inclined. He is largely influenced by his belief in the awesome mercy & love of Kuanyin.

Once we were having our midnight supper, we saw an old woman folding & collecting some carton boxes at one corner. My son later went to the ATM to withdraw some cash. He wanted to give it to that old woman. After the ATM withdrawal, he could not find her as she has probably walked away. He refused to give up. He went around a few metres searching high & low for her. We failed to find her anyway. And I can see sadness in his face on our way back to home. Quite often if he come across old people begging on the streets or collecting cans or cartons, he will pass them a few dollars in cash. My son really has a BIG heart.

Many of you may think he must be old fashion-minded in view of his religious beliefs. You are wrong, man. My son is very fashionable, approachable, humble, lovable & professional especially in his hairdressing skills.

My wife - the Korean drama addict!

2006-10-04T02:00:00.000+08:00

Korean drama is every husband's nightmare! The same as World Cup football match which is every wife's nightmare? Well, we, the husbands should be quick to our defence & said at least, the World Cup fixtures happen once in every 4 years. But the Korean drama is not! They are everywhere, everyday on our TV channels, video shops & now even their movies plagued our movie channel rather than the regular drama series channel.

My wife is Wonder Woman of the year! She can watch two television screens at the same time & with her two eyes. In our living hall, on our left is our 55 inch Projector TV which she play regular her Korean drama VCDs or DVDs. On our right is our 29 inch picture tube TV used for SCV programs which screen her favourite Korean drama series too.
Fantastic! She had already watched Da Chang Jin on VCD. And watch twice the videos. Then when the show runs on SCV channel, she watch again. When the show ends & start its re-run in late hours, she watch again. Later, the show arrives at free Channel U, she watch again. I lost count how many times she watch....

My wife loves Korean drama to the extent of buying the expensive imported korean magazines, depicting those weepy actors or actresses. Never mind she don't read korean language. Can see the pictures already make her so happy.

The fans' love for their favourite korean stars also get wierd. Every korean actor seems to be so flawless & handsome & actresses so dead gorgeous.

The plot is always predictable. It seems like glorification of the old Hongkong movies in 60s & 70s. And they seem to encourage incest. The story has to always start from childhood. Boy meets girl. Fall in love. Girl meet another boy who MUST be the best friend of first boy. Fall in love. All grown up. First boy don't know girl is sister, the kind of same father, different mothers or same mother, different fathers. Second boy also refuses to give up love for same girl. Then adult struggle & complicated love triangle. How to solve the complication or problem? Car accident. Either one of the three leads must go. Or worst still - ALL THREE MUST DIE at end of drama. Scary? Sometimes it is outright damn boring & can be quite sickening. Yet these may be the reasons why many fans love it. I don't know & better don't talk much or else my wife will kill me.

What else? O ya. In the old Hongkong dramas, small eyes belong to baddies or crooks. Now in korean dramas, small eyes are cutie, cutie, cutie.. like Rain. And the girl used to cry a lot in old movies but now it is the guy cry. Tears can flow like a river, non-stop & don't seem to get dry.

Right now, my wife has a sizable collection of Korean VCD dramas. They don't cost cheap. I think she can open a Korean drama VCD or DVD library shop in due time.

I may not be a Korean drama fan but I am a fan of my wife. Hopefully one day, we can go to Korea for holiday & she can visit those korean drama sites.

By the way, my son resembles famous Korean actor, Jang Dong Gan a lot. Very much like twin except Jang Dong Gan is more senior. So bloggers, now you know how my son look like.

Begging Singapore To Smile.....

2006-10-01T01:41:00.000+08:00

A foreign friend of mine who is very observant, asked me why Singaporeans start to smile only when they fly out from Changi airport. And why does the smile seems to fade & gone when they arrive home?

There is some truth in his words. I myself, is one of the "difficult" Singaporeans who find it really hard to smile. We must be really & ready to smile for a valid reason & not to do so when we are been begged to smile recently.

Singapore is probably the only nation on earth where our Government has to beg us for our four million smiles to welcome the IMF delegates.

It was as if made possible with using botox on our faces. Remind me of the face of Jack Nicholson as The Joker in Batman movie. So plastic!

IMF meetings are over. So are our smiles.

My son who just came back from Hanoi, Vietnam, felt the same way as what my foreign friend claim. When in Hanoi, he really feel very happy & free even though Hanoi is quite backward in terms of living conditions & standards as compared to Singapore. Almost everyone he meet, is very friendly, smiling very naturally. It reminds him of Thailand also where the thais are very generous with their smiles.

These are some of the 800 pictures taken by my son while in Hanoi. It depicts the simple but happy lives of vietnamese.

We have paid a very high price for our country's success & development. We paid so with our smiles gone forever. Sigh.....

End of era for pagers ......

2006-09-28T21:29:00.000+08:00

"Hello... sia ka pager?" or "sia beep beep?" - does not this question sound familiar to you? Hahaha, those are the days when we normally would say when we return paging calls to our beepers.

I still kept my antique motorola pager. I have been using mobile phones from day one when its service is first launched in Singapore. I used to own some of the old generation of mobile phones from the first model of Motorola mobile phone (known as the "big brother" or "大哥大 “) to the present compact Sony-Ericisson.

The earliest model of Motorola mobile phone such as the "big brother" was usually priced at slightly more than $3000. Today, the compact one is easily below $700 and it is even inbuilt with a mini digital lens camera.

Mobile phone technology has evolved rapidly within the last decade. It certainly has now well replaced the radio pagers. What could have they think of next?

12th wedding anni - more good years pls...

2006-09-25T01:27:00.000+08:00

Today is 12th year anniversary of my marriage. 12 wonderful years of ups & downs with my wife. It has not been easy nor difficult. The most important thing is she stays throughout thick & thin with me. We have also literally mature as the years roll by.

We are still childless & we accept this fate. Which is why we are no longer stressful. Instead we are happy to enjoy that kind of freedom which most married couples with children may not have. We have a grown-up godson who respect us a lot. These are the best gifts in my life - a loving wife & a filial godson. What else can I ask for?

Stress city...more money flow-in for hair salons?

2006-09-22T16:46:00.000+08:00

Have we ever wondered why quite a number of guys like to frequent hair salons? It used to be lady stuff more than a decade ago. Guys in the past usually go to the barbershop.

Today, the increasing walk-ins of both sexes to hair salons have something to do with increasing working & social stress of our society. It is the end result - the inexplicable good feeling of renewed confidence & de-stress after the hair-do.

Why do we feel good after a hair-do? Many claim hair cutting literally take off some weight from our heads. Some said we left our “old” image behind & walk out with a “new” younger image.

Surprisingly, ask any hairstylist & probably you hear the same answer. Actually I suspect most hairstylists or us do not know the theological reason. I don’t know either. I only know we humans like to be pampered & treated like kings or queens. And the personalized attention given to us in hair salons make us feels supreme. It is true - the more stressful the city become, the hair industry seems to make more money.

That "tissue" of power & authority...

2006-09-19T22:08:00.000+08:00

SO much talk on Singapore having First World class government, institutions and economy. But are we, Singaporeans having First World Class social behaviour?

When was the last time we criticise about China men or women having uncivilized habits, finding them irritating for talking so loud in MRT trains? Have we forgotten we may be equally the same?

Have we not seen group of students talking so loud that they think they have “booked” the whole train. Have we not feel awkward that students chatting across opposite seats in MRT train, treating we, the passengers standing in between them as dead?

Why are we subjected to a daily dose of piercing ring tones on MRT rides? In the past decade when the mobile phone is a luxury, people like to show off their latest model. Now with mobile phones getting cheaper, people are actually trying to show off the latest ring tone. Weird again? In developed & richer countries like Japan, you don’t hear ring tones often in public or on public transport. They regard this as plain rude.

Raffles Place – the distinctive place of most First World Class people? Think again. Look at the picture I snap in one of the cafes at Raffles Place. A used packet of tissues carries high authority. It empowers the person who put it there on the empty chair as rightful reservation to the seat. It is even more “powerful” than a written legal tenancy contract. A contract would need the presence of witnesses together with signatures from all named parties in order to enforce. But this packet of tissues does not need any witness, signature or name written on it. The owner can just come later and claim his tissues together with the seat. He don’t even have to prove that packet of tissue belongs to him. Weird? At least I know China people don’t do that.

So we think we are more civilized than others. Think again.

Preface

2006-09-17T02:40:00.000+08:00

When I told a couple of friends that I have just started a blog, I was surprised by their negative reactions. And some spare no effort to laugh at me. I can fully understand why. You see, I am in my mid-forties. Many of my peers think this age of blogging only belongs to the young. Some even said blogging is a waste of time and display of stupidity. Some of my friends are employers. They actually read blogs of potential young employees who unwittingly reveal their blogs, to aid in their recruitment judgements. They told me many bloggers are foolish to reveal one's own dirt or personal information to the whole world.

I was a bit taken back by this alert. But then, I see some of my friends actually have the standard understanding of blogs as "online diary". I don't deny I did come across blogs which are very revealing on one's personal life. Some blogs are outright boring because they record even the slightest matter or happening which are actually routines. It is true that some bloggers keep on posting ANY information just for the sake of posting. Hahaha.

I have asked myself for days whether I will end up doing the same thing. If it is so, I may be really wasting my precious time. But again, one fact remains: I really love writing and I do so ever since I was very young.

I write my diary since when I was in primary school. Even up to today, I still write occasionally despite busy schedule. This is probably the only reason why I can still recollect memories of my childhood days in detail.

This blog will not be just another online diary. Because I am for one not prepared to share very personal things or wash one's own dirty linen in public. I intend this blog to be of more journalistic nature or a collection of several items such as electronic reviews, ideologies, sharing of life experiences, my outlook on social problems and counselling, and most importantly, demostration reviews on my son's work. He is a professional hairstylist with an international hair salon. It will be supplemented with original pictures.

Happy reading. Hopefully soon.

my blog of life stories begins......................

2006-09-09T00:55:00.000+08:00

I imagine happy
and free as I could be
If I took me a little less seriously
If I 'd laugh at my faults every once in a while
and accept my mistakes with a shrug and a smile
If I'd take little setbacks and failures in stride
And remember successes with pleasure and pride
imagine how happy and free I could be
If I did all I could to enjoy being me.